Beyond the application, the financial, legal, and logistical reality of launch
The moment your child turns 18, they become a legal adult. Schools can't talk to you. Doctors can't share information. You lose access to everything unless you've put specific legal documents in place. This article walks you through the four essentials every parent needs to know, and the documents you need to sign before move-in day.
Here's what nobody tells you: at 18, your child's medical information becomes private. Even if they're on your insurance. Even if you're paying the bills. Even if they're home with the flu, the hospital can legally refuse to tell you anything.
Without a healthcare proxy (also called a medical power of attorney), you cannot:
This is the most urgent legal document you need. It's also one of the easiest to get in place.
A healthcare proxy is a simple document that authorizes you (or another trusted person) to make medical decisions and access health information if your child can't. It only activates when needed. Most of the time, it sits in a drawer doing nothing.
Don't frame this as "What if something bad happens?" Instead: "I want to be able to help if you're sick or injured. This just means doctors can tell me what's going on so I can support you. You're in charge of your decisions, this just keeps me in the loop."
You have three options:
We recommend getting it done before move-in day. Print two copies and give one to your child to keep in their dorm (or give to their RA). Keep one at home.
"Hey, before you head to school, I need to talk about something practical. At 18, doctors can't talk to me about your health anymore unless you sign something. I'm not trying to spy, I just want to be able to help if you're in the hospital or something. Can we fill out a healthcare proxy form together?"
"Do I have to?"
"No, it's your choice. But think about it: if you got injured and needed someone to make a call, wouldn't you want me to know what's happening? It's like giving me permission to be helpful."
FERPA is the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act. It's a federal law that protects student privacy. And starting the moment your kid enrolls, it protects them from you.
Your child's college cannot share academic records, grades, class schedule, or even confirm their enrollment without written permission. You can't call and ask how they're doing in organic chemistry. You can't request their transcript. You can't know if they're on academic probation.
Your child can give permission. Most schools have a simple form that lets students authorize parents to access specific information. Some use an online portal. Some require a written letter. Every school handles it differently.
This law exists to protect student independence. But it can feel jarring for parents who are used to being in the loop. The key is communication with your child. If they're willing to share grades, class schedule, or other information, they can authorize you to see it directly or just tell you themselves.
You're still paying tuition. But the school can't discuss how your money is being spent without permission. This is why having a conversation about FERPA authorization is important, not to snoop, but to stay informed about the investment you're making.
Contact your child's college and ask for the FERPA release form. Have your child sign it. Some schools will do this during move-in orientation, but don't count on it. Be proactive.
Money conversations with college-bound kids are awkward. Most parents avoid them. This is a mistake. Your child needs to understand three things: what you're paying for, what they're responsible for, and what happens if money runs out.
The biggest mistake is handing over a credit card and hoping for the best. Your child has no framework for spending. They don't know if $100 a month for food is reasonable. They don't understand the difference between needs and wants when everything feels new and urgent.
Be specific. Tuition, housing, meal plan, books, lay it out. Show them the bill. Let them see the number. This isn't to scare them; it's to build context. Many kids have no idea college costs $30,000+ a year.
This varies by family, but be clear. Examples:
Have a contingency plan. Do they work a part-time job? Do they ask you for emergency funds (and what counts as an emergency)? Can they use a credit card? What are the consequences if they overspend?
College is often the first time your child experiences the relationship between money and consequences. Let them learn this lesson on a smaller scale, with $20 or $50 at stake, rather than thousands of dollars.
"Before you go, I want to make sure we're on the same page about money. I've been thinking about what I'm paying for and what makes sense for you to handle. Let's go through it together."
"Like... how much are you spending?"
"The total bill is [amount]. This is what college costs. I'm covering [X], and here's what I think you should handle [Y]. I also want to talk about what happens if you need more money, like, when is okay to ask, and when should you problem-solve on your own?"
When your child turns 18 and leaves home, your insurance situation changes. Some policies auto-extend. Some drop them immediately. Some require you to do nothing. Most require you to do something, and if you don't, you'll regret it.
The good news: The Affordable Care Act lets you keep your child on your health insurance until age 26, even if they're in college and living away from home.
The action item: Don't assume this is automatic. Contact your health insurance provider and confirm your child stays on the plan. Make sure you have:
If your child is taking a car to college, you need to handle this immediately.
If they're NOT taking a car, let your insurer know. You might get a discount.
This is the one most parents forget. Renters insurance covers their belongings (laptop, clothes, etc.) in the dorm. Your homeowners insurance does NOT extend to their dorm room.
Many student renters policies bundle with other coverage and cost less than you'd expect. Get quotes from multiple insurers. Some even offer discounts for good students or specific colleges.
This is where everything comes together. Before your child moves into their dorm, you need to have these documents signed, printed, and in place. Some go with them. Some stay at home with you.
Why: Lets you access medical information and make decisions if needed
Where to get: Your state health department, an attorney, or a legal document service
Timeline: 1–2 weeks
Why: Authorizes healthcare providers to discuss their health with you
Where to get: Your doctor's office or download a template
Timeline: Same-day (simple form)
Why: Lets the college share academic information with you
Where to get: College registrar
Timeline: Call now; they'll email it
Why: If they have a bank account, you may need access to transfer money quickly
Where to get: Your bank
Timeline: When you open their account
Why: Lets you handle financial/legal matters if they can't
Where to get: An attorney
Timeline: 1–2 weeks
Note: More comprehensive than a healthcare proxy; not always necessary for college, but good to have
The Launch Kit has a College who pays for what worksheet: the annual cost of attendance split line by line, the monthly allowance, and the conversation to have first.
The Launch Kit covers the years a kid leaves home: finding a direction, college, the trades, the military, and the first apartment and job. Print the whole thing or just the page you need, and fill in what you know. The blanks that are left are your list of what to go find.
Download the Launch Kit (PDF)Paper goes stale, and that is the one problem no binder solves. Hubstone holds the same record and keeps it current, so a changed phone number or a renewed policy updates once instead of in three places.
General information, not legal, medical or financial advice. Requirements differ by state.